Posted by: keepfishing | February 2, 2010

A Thought on ‘love’ at Valentines

Having just endured a horrible 5 minutes inside a card shop a mere two weeks before Valentine’s Day, a shope suddenly resplendent in the most garish reddish hues and sparkly bits possible, with so much tat filling shelf space that I had to pass my purchase through stacks of mugs and balloon strings to reach the cashier, a thought occurred to me.

Who on earth thinks a teddy bear with a heart is EVER an expression of love? If I received one of these mass-produced flea-magnets, I would take it as a direct indicator of a lack of love.

“Darling, I wont thank you for the bear, because clearly you don’t love me, and it is thus lying. Had you loved me, you would have listened to me in our conversations, observed my hobbies and pursuits and possibly bought me something that I would genuinely like and could convey the fact that you care for me and want me to enjoy and pursue my passions in life. As it is, you clearly don’t know me at all, or couldn’t be bothered to think of anything that would actually signify you cared about our relationship. Instead, you toddled to a card shop, shelled out a fiver and bought into some mindless corporate image of cutesiness. It’s over.”

Unless of course I had a particular obsession with cuddly toys, in which case love was clearly being demonstrated.

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Responses

  1. 100% agreed. i have a thing for any stuffed animal. as in, whenever a guy gave me one, he lost a LOT of points and eventually got dumped.

  2. LOL. Agreed.

    Though I like heart shaped milk chocolate lollipops. But for the silliness factor not the ‘I love you so much’ factor.

    But things like…flowers (like I know what to do with them?) Nestle Chocolate (big mistake…HUGE) cheesy cards, romantic chick flicks (ugh…or worse films like Pride and Prejudice…) or anything pink… just..no.

  3. There is an argument to say love and it’s expressions should not be so utilitarian as to appeal to one’s hobbies. That my love for you is not based on such mortal and terrestrial things as the practical and the useful or relevant, but that I love you above, beyond, even in spite of these. Now while this may offer justification for the giving of flowers, it seems to give the post-industrial a license to a stratosphere of tat. There is a certain helplessness, despair and even cruelty, possibly a willed irony, definitely a selfishness in these teddy bears as empty symbols, crude cymbals, resounding gongs. We only play at love now, we have lost by subcontracting love’s labours that might have constituted a suffering substance.
    Teddy bears are completely baffling.

  4. You spelt shop wrong.

  5. You clearly have bought your very lucky girlfriend a thoughtful / insightful present or presentS. Hopefully the latter. Perhaps the second Glee soundtrack, a diamond necklace or tickets to see John Mayer. Im sure all would be greatly appreciated and would show real thought and care.

    However the most intriguing thing will be the Valentines card you had obviously gone to buy in the card shop. Will it have hearts on it? A rose? Or in fact a teddy bear holding a heart.

  6. If I was given a bear, I wouldn’t know what to do with it – it would probably lie covered in dust under my bed… BUT if someone was to be given a bear, maybe they’d need to think about why the other person gave them a bear – maybe they really like that sort of thing and it displays love to them and they wanted to share it with their loved one… or it could be your theory.

  7. so what you’re sayin is… if you’re gonna get someone a bear for valentines day, make sure its a real one?


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